David Dao is about to be PAID in full!

A ​concussion. Broken nose. Two missing teeth. Will have reconstructive surgery.

No, these are not the injuries of a captured criminal. A terrorist did not sustain these injuries! They belong to a 69 year old doctor that didn’t want to miss his flight.

In case you’re curious, one becomes a senior citizen after age 65. Yes, yes, somebody’s grandpa got their ass kicked for not wanting to give up a seat on a plane … a seat that they paid for.

I get it though. Some of you have read the fine print. Airlines have a right to make you vacate your seat. Unfortunately, since they didn’t specify in writing that they could absolutely FUCK YOU UP,  David Dao is about to be PAID.

Some of you blame him for not “just getting up,” but I think you’re effectively saying you think he deserved that beatdown. You’ve a right to your opinion. However, let me now remind you that Dylann Roof shot up an entire church and was safely escorted to a police car without a scratch on him and fed Burger King.

Who’s the real criminal here?

Let us also reflect on his possible (is it confirmed yet?) criminal history. Using this logic, he deserved it. Using that logic, I to deserve to be beat up. I stole candy as a kid. Thieves aren’t cool.

But let’s not use that logic. I don’t steal anymore.

I leave you with this: David Dao has five children. All of his grandchildren will now go to college. For free.

United Airlines, come holla at my grandma. She’s been wanting a Range Rover!

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